Reframing Memories of a Complicated Father After He's Gone

"In recent years I’ve been blown away by the power of focusing on the positive. This can be done without blindness to abuse or suffering. And even the most conflicted and harmful people have their moments when they shine, when their gifts lift up those around them. These may be tiny or brief, but I’ve never met a person who was pure sadism, nor have I met some kind of demi-god who was exclusively uplifting. We all contain ebbs and flows of subtle intentions and feelings.

When my father was gone, I chose to focus on those positives and capture them here. Now when each Father’s Day arrives, my memories of him as a good man and committed dad grow with those passing years. The hurt and bitterness fade. I’ve been meaning for instance to write a post on having an “adventure mindset.” It’s a set of intentions that transcend our circumstances, go beyond any limitations of time or resources and help us to engage in each day with wonder, curiosity and awe."



Once Dad’s Gone, The Good Memories Can Grow — Dad Stuff — Medium



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