A Man Cares for his Wife with Dementia -- With the Help of His Girlfriend

Design/cooking/lifetyle expert B. Smith has dementia. The woman once called "the black Martha Stewart" once presided over an empire that included restaurants and magazines, but now she has dementia. Her husband still cares for her lovingly and keeps her fans up to date through social media. But some of them are upset because he has a girlfriend, who helps him in caring for her.

“We were friends,” Alex said. “I didn’t want to go out with a married man.” Plus, she’d socialized with B. at charity events. But when Dan invited her to breakfast at a popular hotel with B., she accepted.

Finally, she saw. “This is not a man cheating on his wife,” she told herself. In the middle of breakfast, Alex helped B. to the bathroom.

Alex had a nurturing spirit. And she saw the same in him. “What I admire about him,” she said, “is that he takes care of her.” ....Despite the online response, those who know Dan and B. defend the relationship. “Anybody that would judge Dan knows nothing about the disease and the toll it takes” on a marriage, Schnayerson said. “If you can find a companion who can help you get through that, all power to you.”

Dana also pointed out that her father has not abandoned B. by any measure. “She’s in this house. She’s here every day,” she said.

And, on many days, so is Alex. “If I can be compassionate to her,” Alex said, her voice breaking, “if I can do anything for her, it makes me feel good. If it is giving her something to drink, or making her something to eat — she loves to eat — I feel good.”

Lifestyle guru B. Smith has Alzheimer’s. Her husband has a girlfriend. Her fans aren’t having it.